I love questions

morningstar has been a friend of mine for years through when I subbed and Dommed for quite a few years. We have agreed on many points and disagreed on many others. she has always made me think about things I have said with her insight into the lifestyle with questions and thoughts. she is more of a purist when it comes to remaining in one role where I am switch , one of the subjects that we have opposing views on. Of course if you do not hear from me in a few days I am having coffee with moringstar today and I will let you draw your own conclusions (LOL)

SO for my friend here is my response to your question.


From morningstar:

Cloud...... i have a question for You... I love questions

describe the pain .. the intensity.. the simple feel of a flogger.. from a whip.. from a cane.. from a tawse for me please??

For me a simple flogger is like a strong massage , a whip has much more of a bite to it a cane well a cane is nasty at best. I feel the stroke when it lands and it continues well in to the next stroke. It is a sting it has the deep burning sensation and if done right feels like it has cut you to the bone. There is always an after feeling and the welts and abrasions left are quick to open I can feel a good caning for days afterwards. The tawse I have not felt therefore I do not use it on others but I love the warmth of a leather strap how it builds I miss it when it stops. Sanding something that not many do which is causing abrasions with a fine sand paper then applying alcohol or vinegar can cause a nasty pain that cannot not be soothed easily. The pain endures for quite sometime if you like you sub to dance around or squirm a lot I wool say this is one of the better ways just be prepared it cannot not be stopped once it starts you have to wait till it subsides and those minutes seem like hours.

Now describe how each of those toys feels to me... the pain.. the intensity .. all of it..

I could not tell you what you feel, only that I would know what type of sting it has and when I should use it. Perhaps it would help in the judgment of a new Dom as to what strength to use with each toy


Now tell me how a Dominant who perhaps is NOT a masochist can truly KNOW what the pain feels like for me??
Well they cannot but I seem to remember a certain sub saying that she wished she could use a whip on a Dom so that they could understand what it is like when it wraps and how it destroys the mood . This theory just takes it a little farther

AND as for being a Dom for a day?? how can any sub honestly know the feelings / the responsibilities for a Dom ?? i have no desire to know what it feels like to HIT someone...... i did it once.. i made the person wince and i thought i was going to be sick to my stomach......

I can understand that but to be a Dom you do not have to cause pain. Bondage does not have to be painful it can just be restraining and what better way to tickle someone if they are restrained! Again did you not try to do some bondage and found out how much concentration you must have to be successful. I think at least for me I gain a great amount of respect and understanding when I fail at things for those that do it effortlessly.

sorry but i just don't see how this theory (that many hold) of "walking in the other's shoes" (so to speak) can bring a whole lot of benefit...

Well what brought this to mind was an idea that someone who knew nothing about the lifestyle could look at a site and have enough knowledge to become someone's Dom. I found it ridiculous and dangerous for someone to think that they could give what the sub needs by reading and not experiencing any part of the lifestyle. We know that some sites go very extreme and some are only fantasy so for me the benefit would be that this new Dom did not think that he could pick up any instrument of pain and wail away. Nor should he think that the sub is a doormat as depicted in some site to be used and abused with no regard to her needs, wants or limits. For me this type of education would be the same as saying I am going to run the Boston marathon tomorrow, with out having at leasted walk the distance first.

To bodybuilder my best time for a marathon would be the 1975 Montreal marathon, as soon as I finished it I will post my time.