Well a quite voice has enter my realm and stood up for what she believes in. A shock that someone reads what I write, can formulate their own opinion and expressed it with politeness. Though I see that you still hide I hope that you return and read this amy.
"If maintaining the older ways is important to you then that is something you can fit into your relationship, but I don't think it is fair to cast away the lifestyle because it doesn't totally fit into your expectations."
Well amy I speak of expectations based on experience not on fantasy and
"fitting it into my relations" are not words that I would use, bdsm is the relationship and that is one point where we differ in opinion it is not kinky sex but a matter of duty and honour to me a way of life you could say. When you say it is not fair to cast away the lifestyle I am not thinking of casting it away like old clothes I have great respect for it and those that hold it close to their hearts I meant I was thinking of not being active because what I expect and want in my opinion has gone the way of the dinosaur. One way to describe it would be the difference of attending a royal ball in the seventeen hundreds and going to a disco yes there is dancing but it is just not the same, for me at least.
" i think the lifestyle has evolved into something so much more than it used to be"
yes it has evolved but it has not kept the basic etiquette that is need for a group of individuals to say that they share a lifestyle. Evolution is fine I do not expect to live in medieval times but the evolution that I see is more of replacement because those that are coming on, the future shall we say, cannot handle the duties, rules,expectations and etiquette necessary for the lifestyle to exist. An example sports rules are always being re-thought to keep the masses interested not to keep the sport pure . In golf once you struck the ball you did not touch it again until it went into the whole, now well I will say no more about golf.
"It gives each couple a chance to build the lifestyle that works best for them.....why would that take away from the lifestyle"
In my opinion you build a relationship on a lifestyle on the rules and etiquette of that lifestyle or you build on your own rules and etiquette. If you say that you build it on a lifestyle then removing parts of the lifestyle that you do not wish means destroy the lifestyle and I am against that. That is the weakness that I find in the lifestyle now like children not eating the peas but still getting the desert. You must work for the desert to truly enjoy otherwise it is just part of the meal, common place nothing special and what do you do then?
amy your words allowed me to peruse what I have been thinking for years and now expressed thank you I hope that your journey continues and your relationship blossoms in to all what you need from the bdsm lifestyle, as for my rantings and ravings well that is what the dinosaurs do before the comet strikes.
enjoy the day
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2 comments:
This post made me see your point more clearly.
"In my opinion you build a relationship on a lifestyle on the rules and etiquette of that lifestyle or you build on your own rules and etiquette. If you say that you build it on a lifestyle then removing parts of the lifestyle that you do not wish means destroy the lifestyle and I am against that."
This makes much sense to me, but makes me wonder why you hold so tightly to "old" lifestlye. This doesn't leave much, if any, room for adding bits of yourself. I always looked at old tradition or old ways (for lack of a better term)as more of a guidline.
I haven't run into many who share your view. It seems almost to simple, but has made my wheels turn:) You seem very committed to obtaining your ideal which I find commendable and inspiring.
amy
P.S. I hope I don't sound to much like the novice I am.
.....and Thank you for answering my questions.
amy
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