Expectations

I can see that expectations based on fantasy is a not a good idea, they will seldom be met and frustration will set in.

I have based my expectations on experience from a different place and time and I see that the differences are so great that I am disillusioned with the reality. When first brought in to the life style there was clear order in it they were those that were the masters and those that served. Safety was not a question it was expected the poor Master that allowed something to go wrong would loose all but the most loyal. Once the contract was signed there was no asking of the slave what they were not willing to give over in the contract and no refusal from the slave to anything that was not reserved in the contract. Then again the people involved were of a different breed. They still had to hide much more then they do today they were the true thrill seekers you could say in the lifestyle. Yes many have come out and said we are of this lifestyle but they are of a water down lifestyle not the ones that inspired books and fantasies. Ones that are trying to be acceptable, palatable to the non lifestylers.

I will say that a few friends try to live to the protocols but are forced in many ways to change them for others. I could see changing them for those not in the life style but not for those who are supposedly in the lifestyle. I saw a sub slave what ever you want to call them sit on a chair when there was a Dom standing, the same sub sat on the furniture in the nude with no thought to bring a towel or ask for one and no reason why he could not sit on the floor. I do not see the reward in such actions nor do I understand the non-action of their Dom/Domme.

I believe that this lack of commitment by those in the lifestyle gives into the decay of the lifestyle and not the betterment of it. It could be because the masses can now enter it is not reserved for those that had all the other experiences and needed more that something was missing. Many people are entering it for the wrong reasons in my opinion, those that cannot find love, they think it is the trend now and in a few years it will be bell bottoms again, and the worse are those who use it to say look at me look what I can do well I hate to tell those people is that some of us look at you and laugh you are not doing anything that others have not allowed you to do you will never be masters only mastered.

When we hid in darkshadows the few were far more committed to the lifestyle than to the show which it has become. This realization has create doubt in continuing in this lifestyle it has changed too much and this dinosaur is tired of the evolution. Since I cannot seem to find a sub or a Domme that has the same experience, commitment and desire that I do , I am starting to think about sitting back and just watching the birds and the clouds and remembering days gone by. I shall soon make one further attempt to find a like minded individual or a group that have the same ideas that I do until then I shall honour those commitments that I have until after the camp then take time to think and decide how to seek what I look for.