The title was a comment from milla on my last blog. I would say that most subs have desire for emotion from their Doms. It is that I have do not wish it. I do not want to be part of their vanilla
lives I have my own vanilla life to lead with all it's complications. I do not wish to take on another's. I like to remain closed and not open myself up. When I negotiate I state this very firmly and where I have made mistakes is when I try to open myself up. Could be my age and I am feeling more father like caring more about well being than their desires. I do know that I have trouble showing any emotion to my family. It is just not in me to do.So this Dom seeks only chattel. If a 24/7 situation would present it self to me I would only
accept it under lifestyle rules and that would exclude her vanilla life connections . Not that I would refuse her right to them just that I would not include myself in them. The only emotion I would need to worry on would be appreciation for being a good slave.This is not a statement of what all Doms should be or what all subs should expect. It is a statement to remind myself of my wishes and desires. The other thing it does for me is define more of a difference between sub and slave.
Some of my friends will say that I keep emotions buried deep inside others will say that I am just a cold hearted bastard. Well each will have reasons for their thoughts I need not analyze them merely accept them as their opinions. As for finding the perfect slave I am sure their is one out there that has similar desires and since it is my birthday I will keep wishing for one as I blow out the candles.
ps for the romantics out there, a very happy Valentines.
9 comments:
Cloud:
i don't know about your conviction that slaves/submissives shouldn't want emotions from their Doms... what if they showed NO emotion towards the Dom??? there is something just too cold in that premise..
And without emotion how does one judge if the other is happy or not?? how does the Dom judge if the sub is ok??? i have had times when people have pointed out to me that my silence during a session is unnerving to them.. they can't tell what i am feeling.........
so no i think it is more than a little important to have some emotions in any relationship.. BDSM.. friendship.. vanilla.. whatever... it is after all what makes us human - emotions that is..
morningstar (owned by Warren)
We have been friends for a while and we have differed for as long on many things. I do not do well as a human never have at least not outwardly. Silence does not bother me they have their safe word. What bothers me is hurting anyone where there are no visible marks that is done when I show them emotions and then they fantasies about a vanilla life that I cannot give to them. As I said this is best for me and for those that wish me as their Dom.
Cloud:
Actually i reread Your blog after i had commented.. i nearly deleted my comment....... (i am gonna blame a feverished brain that is just returning to normal).. i understand what You mean..... about no emotions.. no vanilla ones anyway....
i wish You much luck in finding this slave..... You know that.. i only want Your happiness..
morningstar (owned by Warren)
I totally understand also. Thank You for writing this post to explain to me, what a lucky girl to get my questions answered so quickly and constructively! I see what You are searching for now and i see how it fits into Your life. I should really have guessed that before, having read other posts. I think i had an instinctive "but *i* want emotion* reaction, where i really should know that the no-comparison rule always should apply. We all want such different things and they are all valid, thank You again for Your time :D
--[milla]
I wonder what you mean by 'emotion'...
Is it signs of attachment? Is it 'needs' for more than you are willing to give?
For the record, I know that I wouldn't submit just to submit... in that, I implie thast I am not a sub from the heart... It is not in my own nature... I become sub once my heart is running my head... I need to be in love to do so... and even then , I need to have my own desires fullfilled, a way or another... What doesn't make me a 'do me sub' for that...
I find it strange to read your post, because what I know from HIm, and his past encounters, many 'subs' are interested into the submission part without the attachment... I now wonder if one isn't encountering those who will make him evolved... Maybe is it something you have to look at? Why do you meet and play with subs who are more needy than you want?
Why was he encountering sub that didn't want anything 'personal' coming in the way?
And... from there... why did I meet Him after 8 years out of it, because of a very damaging experience, in which I had 'emotions', call them 'love', 'affection',whatever... and was at that time really against everything coming close or far to BDSM? Why did I have to meet Him if it not to dive back in it?
Interesting topic... I'm leaving with more questions than before...
SeaRabbit
Well searabbit to me emotion means a vanilla attachment. The emotion of love I truly cannot return so I do not want vanilla emotions involved with the lifestyle any lifestyle commitment
Ummmm
*peeks*
I just desired to wish YOU happy birthday Cloud. I very much enjoy your writing, but sometimes I dont feel adequate enough in my ability to write to express myself to comment.
I know that sounds very pathetic...but honestly sometimes, some people, make me feel unable to express as well as they do, which is a compliment to you!
So I sit here, tight lipped and hope you had a wonderful birthday!
rosebud3cc
rosebug an area of the body I do like. Now as for you writing expressing yourself should never be critiqued so my sweet you should write like your first step you must take it so you can run.
Thank you, Sir.
rosebud
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