It is not suppose to hurt

After a very long hiatus I had a play session with an old friend. Yes I had given littleone a few swats but that is not quite the same as a whole session, which lasted about 8 hours off and on.
Byt the fourth hour I noticed my shoulder was very stiff hmmm well I had made a few new toys and I thought I am just not used to them. So I ordered a nice hot bath and relaxed for a while then afterwards a nap till supper was ready.

After supper I decided to get her dressed for the evening of entertainment some new friends of ours were coming over. So I thought chains a nice start. Do you know how much chains weight with a sore shoulder and back now? Fighting with the chains to secure them I decided to paint on my favorite canvas a slaves ass. Do you know how much your hands shake after straining your arms. Not my best work .

I made a rope harness almost tied my self to the slave, then I demonstrated the punishment stick to the newbies ouch, that hurt me as no sub was involved. The whip I had made, well the first time was great a nice sound in the air but then the newbie sub asked to see it again. And then my slave want desperately to feel the touch of it. Then my arm fell off.

Today my feet hurt, my ankles are swollen, and the back is not yet straight. My arms hurt, my wrists crack and my neck just does not want to turn. I had cereal this morning as it did not require me to crack an egg or any other violent motion like buttering toast.

I will from now on put warning labels on all the toys I make "WARNING EXCESSIVE USE MAY CAUSE INJURY TO THE DOM".

As for me well I have fallen out of Dom shape and must whip my self back into it. You know what tht means? A certain slave's ass is going to be red and hurting for next little while I work on her to regain my shape.

punishment .

It is such a nasty word. It sounds bad before any mention is given as to the reason for punishment. I deliver punishment coldly. They are informed why and the reason for the quantity of strokes there is no warm up and no retrain ts. They must hold themselves in position for the strokes. They are given a mantra to state after each stroke. After all strokes are given they are given some time to ponder their error. I give no loving touches from the start of the punishment to the end of quiet time. I remain in the same room as they are but no contact so they can focus on how to improve themselves. I state clear rules for them they have chance to clarify them. I do not punish if the have a good reason and I punish less if it was something they decided upon with knowledge of consequence.

I will punish a slave for breaking rules with out thought towards consequence. I do not like it when subs are mindless or use poor judgement. If something comes up on the spur of the moment and I am not available to decide. I expect the slave to think on how I would answer or decide with full knowledge that they will be punished . At least they can give an explanation as to why they made the decision.

A punishment need not be given as if it is written in stone I want the sub have some hope , with out that they will not grow and make worse decisions in the future.

Throw stones now

The title is from a friend that commented on my last entry. There are too many views and ideas about the lifestyle for any one to sit back and hurl a stone searabbit. Beside that you hit on the head for me a problem that is always mentioned to me by Doms and subs. That in the vanilla world many subs are in dominant positions and must take on the role. I have been told it is hard to change when they come home or to accept the dominance of their mates. The Doms sometimes go through this also in reverse but understandable it is easier for the Dom in a subservient position to change over. SO a question to you . What should the Dom do when the sub has a hard time changing roles? Should they allow the time for it or should the be even stricter near the change from person in charge to sub?

I know there is a lot of variance in the answer to such a black and white question but it is of interest to me. I can give you what I have done in the past. I have allowed 30 seconds. My last two have been in positions of great power. Amanda upon entering the door made the mistake of saying Hi wow what a day before she was naked . I promptly removed her clothes with such force she stumble backwards. she also went home in a blouse and skirt that had to be held closed till she got to the car and Minion got to see my den very quickly when she was late because of a meeting at work. Another question that has come up was I too cruel or was I in the role that they have asked me to be? No I am not a monster my slaves always have free time to discuss anything they want to without penalty but it is at my discression as to when that time is. And for being late well we all have had meeting go late but when it is running late there is always a chance to call and let those waiting to stop worrying . Planning comes in to if those type of meetings usually run long then plan accordingly.

One last question: I would like any sub reading this to comment as to whether they want their lover to greet them at the door with a drink in hand and listen to the day's experiences or do they want their Dom there waiting for them ready to take them from the reality of the vanilla experience and throw them in to a comforting dungeon? Ooops one last question how much delay would you like for the change over?

Okay that is it.

Befuddlement

IT is always easier going with the flow and doing what every one else wants you to is it not. Subs I have noticed have this angelic expression on their faces when they like the rules and decisions of their Masters. Throw them a curve and boy there is defiance and questioning. It is like a pain slut saying in a middle of session no that is not the way you are suppose to spank me. Subbies that love protocols forgetting to do things that they do not like. Each will do this to there on level of comfort with their Doms but they still do it.

It is funny to see subs dripping with submission to suddenly say well I did not think you would do that. So when I hear of subs being perfect submissives I just cringe a bit . All subs have a brat in them , I believe that subs have a predefined fantasy of what their submission is to be . The brat will beguile , mis-inform plot and push limits that they feel take them away from their fantasy of submission. Most hate changes or variants in their road to their ultimate ideals of submission. Constant negociations and suggestions.

I do prefer slaves , one intense negociation at the begining then it is the delightful words yes Master and with maybe some trepidation off they go to fulfill the desires of their Master. Yes I do prefer them. Just after a while I think some complacency does set in and Masters suddenly elevate them and in doing so, take them away from their ideal slavery. Then the brat sneeks out.

I have always prided my self on being a listener, to hear, understand and then provide what the sub/slave wants. Well my befuddlement is when we as Doms or Masters act as we are supposed to and decided for subs and slaves or push them to the submission that they describe to us do we feel that the sub /slave is second guessing us what happened to the trust? Yes I know there are monsters out there and giving such trust could prove deadly but there must be a time when the sub /slave lets go of the control they so desperately seek to give away and accept that they trust us. Funny two individuals wishing to provide for the need of the other only to be dashed by the interpretation of words. Oh well spare the rod and spoil the submissive, one must do what one feels is right one last question is should the titles change? Perhaps we should have degrees such as sometime Dom or quasi Dom or sub Dom maybe levels of Dominance could be by coloured belt , no the martial arts have already done that I know perhaps we should go back to wearing hankies or rings on pinky fingers.

Ah for the days of intolerance and service time to daydream.

Questions

I was asked the other day what is bdsm? Yes I had a good laugh and then said it is a lifestyle based o control, rules, protocols and old fashion punishment. I smirked once more for there is no set rule, protocol nor are the punishments old fashion.

A rule is set in society to govern a majority of people. It is meant to allow groups of individuals co-exist without someone murdering some one else. It does not always work but it is the best thing we have. What is the rule in the lifestyle ? Should you talk to twenty people as a Domme friend of my said on Sunday you will get twenty different rules

Protocols or a set way of doing things , there are protocols for experimenting with radiation they are strickly followed and there is only one set . In the lifestyle well again there is no book of rules and protocols and what is to be done when and how just does not exist. Far more than a way of life it is many ways of life.

Old fashion punishments were the whip, the cane , flogging and my favorite humiliation . Some forms of bondage. The rest were tortures. All were non consensual. So I think the only thing that comes close to an overall connection would be the consensual part. I have friends that I look at them and say that is not my style I would not allow that by my slave or sub. Others I consider to be very extreme and probably not do.

So what is my point? Well considering that we are one side of control or the other We are a bunch of anarchists.

Second session

This is a fun session for me as I see how much the sub has struggle to achieve what was asked of them. How close a shave whether or not they are wearing underwear did they practice their positions did they send all the emails and writings they were supposed to. When naked this time they know that they must live up to the standards set there is a nervous sweat on them as the inspection goes along of course they are punished for any infraction.

This session I dedicate to their anus exploring it with fingers and toys the more uncomfortable it is for them the more pleasure I derive from the examination. Top that off with pictures of various things held tightly in their anus such as feather dusters and carrots with the tops on , after all they must get healthy things too. The last pictures are of them holding their ass cheeks apart showing the abuse their anus has received. Then I give a play session to them again concentration is give to their sex organs and I never forget about their anus . Sent off with my house rules and more positions and tasks. After this session they are no longer allowed to wear underwear in my presence and yes if they meet me in the street by chance they better not be wearing underwear and yes I have ask for the offending items to be removed then and there.

On mountain high

I am feeling alot like an old hermit. One that sits on a mountain high and waits for those willing enough to climb the slope and ask of his experience and knowledge. They ask not for participation only for answers. Sadly I am becoming comfortable with this idea and sit comfortable waiting for the seekers.

I have suggested to ling that her journey would best be served by her new friends and have ask MM to take a more active role in her training. I know this will hurt ling as well as me for the next while. I find that now with the demands of my family and my health that I sadly cannot devote the time needed by ling to further her journey. LDs are far more draining then a face to face relation. I had to think and plan and try to find out if the desired affect was reached. Truly a shame she was so far away she was such a good submissive . In a face to face at least you know how the sub is reacting and what they are doing with out having to ask.

I am certain that MM will enjoy her service as well as ling will learn what it is to be with a Master with honour.

Now for those that might worry I am not dead yet nor do I intend leaving anytime soon I will play now and then, but long term training I will be putting on the side burner for a little while . I will sit on my mountain and rest and watch to see who will climb the slope .

Slave training for the newest of newbies

I have been asked by a newbie for my method so I thought it would be easier to share it here. This cartoon that I found sums up their initial expression but I have written out a first session below and will put up past experiences on training for those that wish them in the future.

After email exchanges and chats and conversations there comes a day the first day a most important day in a subs life. It is at this point where the subs decides. Once that decision has been made this is what happens:

AN inspection first they must strip away their clothes and assume the inspection position I use this position when ever I have been away from the sub for any length of time. Their legs must be spread bent at the waist at about a thirty five degree angle . This spreads the cheeks a little more and allows the breasts to hand a bit giving access to the nether regions head is held straight mouth open and hands just above their head as if they were just about to clasp their head but are not allowed to .

They usually must strain a bit to hold this position especially when they hear the snap of the rubber glove . I explore all areas of entry gently at first then pushing to see what they can take. I will comment at that time as to what they have to do such as shaving and personal care. I allow then to stand up. This takes about 30 minutes from time of entry to when they can first relax.
I then give them a list of easy positions to learn then I of course give them a little session making sure to concentrate on their organs I want to make sure they are excited for most of the time they are there for the first couple of times. Before they are dismissed they must masturbate infront of me ,yes if they are too shy I will stimulate them till they orgasm how ever they will be spanked for the dis-obedience. Oh course if they make the mistake of asking to use the toilet they will be allowed with me standing next to them watching. After about two hours of gentle play the session ends . They are sent to do their homework and given a date when the next session is. Never very long from the first just enough time for them to think about their feelings

Focus lost and found

Focus a word I have used many times when a slave is at hand. When needed a quick slap a tug on the ear and they resume focus. When a Dom looses focus there is no quick return no sudden gesture that will snap them back. Doms have lost subs and still remain in their funk.

What can be done ? Hot wax no we have had drips and spills as we sweetly torture a sub. Electric shock no accidents happen there too and most Doms try out what they will do to their subs on themselves to some degree. Well I can speak only for myself I have two ways. A novice snaps me out very quickly. The ones that have fantasies but no experienced. They ask a thousand questions and might have been on this planet for years yet are infants to this journey.

The other way is an experience slave. Oh yes one that lives to please and obey. One where you only have to tweak the training rather than start from scratch. I do love extremes.

October

Fall for me is a time of contemplation and routines. The month of October means morning fires to take the chill out and hopefully make it to November before putting on the furnace. Putting away the final remnants of summer putting flowers to sleep and removal of the tomato plants. It is also the time for pilgrimages. Yes the visiting of those that are related but not to me. So for a week I will travel through Ontario and Michigan giving well wishes and hugs to people that I haul out like Christmas decorations. They have some meaning but it might have been lost in the years that have pasted.

They do not hold my thoughts on life, nor my desires and most definitely not my confidence. They were the brothers and sisters of my wife not more than that . Why do I do this why not give over this time to myself or to my family. A parents wish that their family will be different that your children will be more then family they will be friends. They will not wait till Thanksgiving or Christmas to pop in to see their brothers and sisters. They will not have to wait for Hallmark to establish a new marketing tool to get us all together. Nice sentiments but not happening. Families are meant to spawn and send the offspring off to populate the world. So why is that so hard of a concept for some why do some cling to what was and try desperately to retard the process and at times like these try to bring back a time when admiration was given to your older sibling because he could tie his shoe.

Many of those sibling that had the greatest of respect then inhabit our prison system now. Control on children must be lost at some point for them to grow sometimes it hurts but pain sometimes is a good thing.

Then there is the pre-occupation with the idea that selections made must stay. The hippie you married and thought of spending the rest of you life with in a small cottage in the north now watches the shopping channel and wants to change the car because it looks old well I am old too but like the car I still sort of work.

The difference between family and friends is one you have to and the other you want to, so to appease the shopping channel surfer I off to see the relatives and have turkey or maybe to see turkies and have relatives , who knows.

Happy Thanks giving to all and sorry to the native americans and turkeys as this weekend has made quite a dent in their lives.

tasks

Such a small word for large endeavors. I do not know why tasks become so daunting for subs. A simple thing write down your experience during your position training. I do not think this to be difficult just a description of what happened and what was felt. I have checked yet no post yet . Well it is not a good re-start for a certain sub is it. Should I be upset . I would guess so but I have something new fo rmy little subbie to experience.

I think ling will not be forgetting her tasks so easily in the future.

A disturbing image

I will expect to see a lot of blogs today about Dawson. They will picture a dark image of a young man holding a gun and news of a horrific day in the life of young people in Montreal. I am a parent of one of those young people who saw fear in the faces of children running for their lives on TV and could do nothing for them.

Luckily my son who usually goes to Dawson on Wensdays to hang out in the Sci-Club and cajole with friends, decide to work overtime yesterday and was oblivious to horror that was taking part. My worries ended at 4:30 with a call from him asking for a lift home as it was raining. I feel for those that must visit their children today in Hospital and of those that must make plans no parent ever want s to face.

I must say that for me the demands of society not it's freedom is the root cause. The norm is not having a parent at home. Parents, to survive must now both work it is not easy to keep up with a child when you are busy solving the problems of bushiness much easier to throw money at the problem buy a new game get a new computer, give too much freedom with little guidance except to reprimand. Hugs and kisses seem to end When our young males get to a certain age. Suddenly they are suppose to come of age and be able to handle all society throws at them. Without the strong base of a parent always around. Kind understanding and parents that took the time to play and see what their child is doing perhaps might not have stopped what happened but certainly the sign might have been detected. I believe sometimes that tuff love is needed equally so are hugs and time with your children, more than a new PC or the latest large TV. All humans crave affection, the warmth of a mothers hug the approval of a Fathers gaze not bits and bytes or how large the idiot box is.

I feel for his parents of the young man that cold not control his fantasies but I feel that they did not help the situation. There is no school for parents and our parents were not perfect but most of time one of them were there. The one thing I feel that all children need is time with their parents and someone to guide them to the right choices. There is a joke that has come into circles now a days I shall not repeat it here just say it is about what would be the greatest punishment for a parent is to be locked away with their teenagers for an hour. Pretty sad statement for the intellectual society that we are suppose to be. What is the disturbing image that I spoke about , teenagers with credit cards and wads of money in malls without their parents.
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Permenant marks

I was asked a while ago by a sub that if we continued along long enough would I put permenant marks on her. I would not answer her , I felt I would be pestered to do so by her at every chance she could bring it up . Was she trying to gain re-assurance that she was mine , or liked body modificatioon or did she tryuly want to show the world she was owned. I am still thinking on that .
A few months ago another asked that question but she asked me what type of marks I would use and would it be a one time thing or a graduated journey. This sub showed thought in her questions so I answered like this.

At first a collar would be provided one she would be required to wear no matter where she went never taking it off without my permission, when I saw she could do this without exception then I would move to chains. I would pierce her nipples and run a chain through the rings. again she would have to show that she would wear it at all times including anytime she had to remove her clothing in front of another. Then her vaginal lips would have rings placed i them and the chains would continue from nipples to lips.
this would be the first part of the marking and would take place over the first five years of our relation. Any regression such as showimng me she had slipped in her training would result in the removal of the last step such as removal of the rings in her lips and if the poor behavior continues she would loose the nipple rings . They would not be replace until she proved herself and yes the flesh would have to had healed before she woud be allowed to have the piercings done again.

Once this level was maintained I would progress to a tatoo first one that would be seen by most as it would be across the top of her butt cheeks so if the her top moved or her pants were low on her back it would be exposed, it woul d progress from there to parts of her back and arms.. Then a navel ring to allow the chains to be gathered.

Last would be a branding that would occur only many years into the journey when I felt she had become the ideal submissive a slave. The branding would be of a private matter shared only with close friends.

I would not say to anyone , my submissive or others that this is not what must be I would be happy to have a slave with no marks no chains no brandings as I feel a good sub/slave proves that she is owned every day she kneels at my feet and gives of herself to me because she wishes to and not because she feels she has to. I would only place these marks should the slave wish them and I would use each level as a reward to her for her achievements. Just my thoughts on the matter

needed

It is the one feeling that will always perk me up. Someone saying I need you. As a parent I had to decipher long stories from my kids that realy meant they needed me for one thing or another,that always brought warmth to me. It inspire me to make danger rooms, volcanos and to hug. Those days have sort of gone by the wayside now I still get hey Dad can you or how do you do this but it is not the same. I am no long all knowing to them as I once was That warmth has not been felt in a while.

My health has cause a great down turn of late in what I think I can do . to a point I have become negative to change or just trying things that I once did with out thinking about. My friend have and will always be there for me but thy do not have the need of me they will continue with or with out me.

ling is on a sabatilcal again and I feel has gotten to the point where her needs are changing also . she needs a Dom that can give her the physical side of control. her training that I can do is almost complete.

About ready to clean out the toys and find them homes to place the rocking chair on the porch . Where I could sit and mindlessly rehash the past and what i had done in my life with anyone foolish enough to ask how ae you to day. Perhaps one last battle with the grim reaper sword against sicle , or my favor to slap a polar bear o the nose.

I was told yes terday I need you by a sub, not hey want have some fun, kinky sex slam bam thank who ever that masked stranger was. No a genuine I need you specificely me from a submissive that feels only I can fill her needs . Only I does she trust with her foray into the lifestyle. Damm feels good to be needed again yes I feel a lot of warmth today. It is for one session , might be two but that is not important it is I am needed that has given me energy and drive once again.

Idle hands

As many of the nuns would say to me in my youth idle hands cause minds to get into trouble. A good saying of course not exactly true I was being reprimanded for having my hands up a young woman's skirt so my hands were far from idle.

This has brought back memories of childhood and the games we played , strip poker, chase and strip of course dare.SO much fun but if I go back further what about jacks. That lovely game where you bounced a ball and tried to pick up as many pointy objects as you could. Hmmm an idea I remember reading about a game for subs such as picking up greased marbles between their cheeks and moving it to a bucket several feet away. Of course there is the marble push. On their knees hands tied behind their back and pushing a marble across a floor to specified destination but nothing with jacks.

You would think that jacks lend themselves to the lifestyle, pointy difficult to handle just sounds like a sub game to me. Like ass grab where the sub with out use of thier hands must grab as many as possible from the floor. Or perhaps a rendition of the tooth pick challenge. Now they used to be made of metal if you found those perhaps they could be heated or frozen just so that the sub does not get board. Hmmm what do you think? Oh what should we do with the ball?

First part is almost over

ling is away so she cannot blog . she is almost finished the first part of her punishment . Which was : 10 pussy smacks , masturbate with out cumming at least 3 times a day finishing off with 5 clit smacks. I believe this will have a mortifying effect on ling. More so that she is away and does not have the comfort of her own space. This part o the punishment was to show her that she cannot always have the lifestyle as she desirers. There are rules and they are to be followed even when they do not give her the excitement and thrill.

The second part of the punishment will be to continue the pussy smacks in the morning and the clit smacks at night however the change will be she must cum 5 times inbetween the smacks. This should give ling the understanding that too much of a getting what you want is not a good thing.

Oh what is a pussy smack well first the pussy is shaved every day as close as possible this sometimes produces razor burn but c'est la vie. Then when the pussy is still damp you take a spatula and apply it briskly to the area as rapidly as possible. Afterwards a liberal dose of acohol to dis-infect the area. The clit smack is simple holding her legs open and her pussy lips she must direct the smacks to the clit. I know this is difficult and she will miss. she must hit the clit 5 times misses do not count

I am sure that somethings are becoming quite tender now. Hopefully this will inspire ling to take tasks seriously and certainly to stay in the proper frame of mind

undertanding and communications

Well I am back, a few pounds lighter, a little slower but I am back. Now lets tear into an issue that has presented itself while I was in hospital.

ling a very good sub so far but fell apart during my absence. she fell apart because she was angry with me for well to say it plainly I was not there everyday for her. I found this amusing as I have set tasks for her given her routines to follow and my friends emails to gain reassurance from in case of an unscheduled absence . Yet her tasks were not complete, her routines sort of done and sort of not.

When was it okay for a sub to be angry at her Dom when her duties were not performed? Yes I have been harsh in the past when she has had unscheduled absences because of worry but I was not angry with her. I was upset but when it was explained I accepted it.

So miss ling yes you are in trouble and yes I will take great delight in the punishment that I have assigned you and the best my dear is yet to come. In the future I suggest you use your tasks and routines as replacement for my presenses when need be.

So nice to be back

Witchcraft

In day of olde when you were sick, you sought out a sooth sayer or witch doctor or warlock. Some magical person that could cure you. If you could stomach the potion then you might just fall asleep or you might start vomiting and fall into coma and then into the great unknown. Some survived some did not. If you did well they wanted to make sure you were strong enough so they would bleed you in various ways, leeches, knives and needles.


How nice that now adays medicine has changed so much. Now they introduce antibiotics that burn your veins and any tissue it touches, you slip in and out of a canatonic sleep induced by the use of pain killers so you do not feel the antibiotics . When they can no longer find veins they send you home with pills that causes you to sleep eat get sick and sleep.

They did say That I am without infection now but I am waiting for the leeches.

Not quite ready to lay down yet

I am at home I am not perfect but I am home. Thank you to well wishers and the visitors all were appreciated. Health wise I have a while to go but I also have a strong will. You will not see much of my writing for at least a week or two but I will be reading. Yes there is plenty of fight left in Me.

The munch

I have taken a lot of time off from blogging and Domming to relax and recoup, I could not give up my munch though. I was not going to attend yesterday sI was going to sit in the pool and just chill. Two of the organizers of the munch were worried that they would not be there on time and asked if I could help out. These two have stretched their hands out to me in so many different ways and times I could not refuse so off I went

I teased old friends and meet jo aka searabbit that if I had known it was her I would have sat with them for a while longer. I spoke with a couple Dom/Domme new to the group. We talked about what makes a sub sub and all quite interesting , I hope they retuun to the next munch. Then there was Bradon applying massages to various females that look like putty in his hands. Ah Paula wow a lively personallity that beamed with excitement just for being there. Mistress Lisa was as always charming with a hint of devilment in her eyes which is betrayed by that lovely evil laught.
Play parties , camps and workshops are great but ther e is nothing like a munch to allow people to find thier way . exchange ideas and just laugh. It is medicinal at thimes at least for me.

Yes it is time to start writing again and seeking out subs and slaves but the critera will be harder for both them and me. I will take my time and they will have to be what I want . I alos have been lacks with ling far too much I would say. She needs a stronger hand with more caring. A lovely crerature that is just out to please and perhaps she is tryin to please too many people and forgets about her self a lot so that will have to be rectified. I alos have to prioritize my life as I have a new Domme to please for information on that just go to the drakor blog. I will say taht she is new will make mistakes and will grow.Hopefully she will learn from me and I from her. Many times in my life after reaching a certain level I have returned to re-study the basics to make sure the fondation is good , you know how you can develop bad habits.

SO I am refreshed and revitalized mostly by the munch and yes the pool does not hurt either. I think I have my humour back at least the bratish part of it I had my piece of pie yesterday so time to get off the fence as some one said yesterday and decide. Just one questions for littleone if you like pain and you are sitting on a fence why would you get off? Oh one last question how do you know if you have splinters?