It is not suppose to hurt

After a very long hiatus I had a play session with an old friend. Yes I had given littleone a few swats but that is not quite the same as a whole session, which lasted about 8 hours off and on.
Byt the fourth hour I noticed my shoulder was very stiff hmmm well I had made a few new toys and I thought I am just not used to them. So I ordered a nice hot bath and relaxed for a while then afterwards a nap till supper was ready.

After supper I decided to get her dressed for the evening of entertainment some new friends of ours were coming over. So I thought chains a nice start. Do you know how much chains weight with a sore shoulder and back now? Fighting with the chains to secure them I decided to paint on my favorite canvas a slaves ass. Do you know how much your hands shake after straining your arms. Not my best work .

I made a rope harness almost tied my self to the slave, then I demonstrated the punishment stick to the newbies ouch, that hurt me as no sub was involved. The whip I had made, well the first time was great a nice sound in the air but then the newbie sub asked to see it again. And then my slave want desperately to feel the touch of it. Then my arm fell off.

Today my feet hurt, my ankles are swollen, and the back is not yet straight. My arms hurt, my wrists crack and my neck just does not want to turn. I had cereal this morning as it did not require me to crack an egg or any other violent motion like buttering toast.

I will from now on put warning labels on all the toys I make "WARNING EXCESSIVE USE MAY CAUSE INJURY TO THE DOM".

As for me well I have fallen out of Dom shape and must whip my self back into it. You know what tht means? A certain slave's ass is going to be red and hurting for next little while I work on her to regain my shape.

punishment .

It is such a nasty word. It sounds bad before any mention is given as to the reason for punishment. I deliver punishment coldly. They are informed why and the reason for the quantity of strokes there is no warm up and no retrain ts. They must hold themselves in position for the strokes. They are given a mantra to state after each stroke. After all strokes are given they are given some time to ponder their error. I give no loving touches from the start of the punishment to the end of quiet time. I remain in the same room as they are but no contact so they can focus on how to improve themselves. I state clear rules for them they have chance to clarify them. I do not punish if the have a good reason and I punish less if it was something they decided upon with knowledge of consequence.

I will punish a slave for breaking rules with out thought towards consequence. I do not like it when subs are mindless or use poor judgement. If something comes up on the spur of the moment and I am not available to decide. I expect the slave to think on how I would answer or decide with full knowledge that they will be punished . At least they can give an explanation as to why they made the decision.

A punishment need not be given as if it is written in stone I want the sub have some hope , with out that they will not grow and make worse decisions in the future.

Throw stones now

The title is from a friend that commented on my last entry. There are too many views and ideas about the lifestyle for any one to sit back and hurl a stone searabbit. Beside that you hit on the head for me a problem that is always mentioned to me by Doms and subs. That in the vanilla world many subs are in dominant positions and must take on the role. I have been told it is hard to change when they come home or to accept the dominance of their mates. The Doms sometimes go through this also in reverse but understandable it is easier for the Dom in a subservient position to change over. SO a question to you . What should the Dom do when the sub has a hard time changing roles? Should they allow the time for it or should the be even stricter near the change from person in charge to sub?

I know there is a lot of variance in the answer to such a black and white question but it is of interest to me. I can give you what I have done in the past. I have allowed 30 seconds. My last two have been in positions of great power. Amanda upon entering the door made the mistake of saying Hi wow what a day before she was naked . I promptly removed her clothes with such force she stumble backwards. she also went home in a blouse and skirt that had to be held closed till she got to the car and Minion got to see my den very quickly when she was late because of a meeting at work. Another question that has come up was I too cruel or was I in the role that they have asked me to be? No I am not a monster my slaves always have free time to discuss anything they want to without penalty but it is at my discression as to when that time is. And for being late well we all have had meeting go late but when it is running late there is always a chance to call and let those waiting to stop worrying . Planning comes in to if those type of meetings usually run long then plan accordingly.

One last question: I would like any sub reading this to comment as to whether they want their lover to greet them at the door with a drink in hand and listen to the day's experiences or do they want their Dom there waiting for them ready to take them from the reality of the vanilla experience and throw them in to a comforting dungeon? Ooops one last question how much delay would you like for the change over?

Okay that is it.

Befuddlement

IT is always easier going with the flow and doing what every one else wants you to is it not. Subs I have noticed have this angelic expression on their faces when they like the rules and decisions of their Masters. Throw them a curve and boy there is defiance and questioning. It is like a pain slut saying in a middle of session no that is not the way you are suppose to spank me. Subbies that love protocols forgetting to do things that they do not like. Each will do this to there on level of comfort with their Doms but they still do it.

It is funny to see subs dripping with submission to suddenly say well I did not think you would do that. So when I hear of subs being perfect submissives I just cringe a bit . All subs have a brat in them , I believe that subs have a predefined fantasy of what their submission is to be . The brat will beguile , mis-inform plot and push limits that they feel take them away from their fantasy of submission. Most hate changes or variants in their road to their ultimate ideals of submission. Constant negociations and suggestions.

I do prefer slaves , one intense negociation at the begining then it is the delightful words yes Master and with maybe some trepidation off they go to fulfill the desires of their Master. Yes I do prefer them. Just after a while I think some complacency does set in and Masters suddenly elevate them and in doing so, take them away from their ideal slavery. Then the brat sneeks out.

I have always prided my self on being a listener, to hear, understand and then provide what the sub/slave wants. Well my befuddlement is when we as Doms or Masters act as we are supposed to and decided for subs and slaves or push them to the submission that they describe to us do we feel that the sub /slave is second guessing us what happened to the trust? Yes I know there are monsters out there and giving such trust could prove deadly but there must be a time when the sub /slave lets go of the control they so desperately seek to give away and accept that they trust us. Funny two individuals wishing to provide for the need of the other only to be dashed by the interpretation of words. Oh well spare the rod and spoil the submissive, one must do what one feels is right one last question is should the titles change? Perhaps we should have degrees such as sometime Dom or quasi Dom or sub Dom maybe levels of Dominance could be by coloured belt , no the martial arts have already done that I know perhaps we should go back to wearing hankies or rings on pinky fingers.

Ah for the days of intolerance and service time to daydream.

Questions

I was asked the other day what is bdsm? Yes I had a good laugh and then said it is a lifestyle based o control, rules, protocols and old fashion punishment. I smirked once more for there is no set rule, protocol nor are the punishments old fashion.

A rule is set in society to govern a majority of people. It is meant to allow groups of individuals co-exist without someone murdering some one else. It does not always work but it is the best thing we have. What is the rule in the lifestyle ? Should you talk to twenty people as a Domme friend of my said on Sunday you will get twenty different rules

Protocols or a set way of doing things , there are protocols for experimenting with radiation they are strickly followed and there is only one set . In the lifestyle well again there is no book of rules and protocols and what is to be done when and how just does not exist. Far more than a way of life it is many ways of life.

Old fashion punishments were the whip, the cane , flogging and my favorite humiliation . Some forms of bondage. The rest were tortures. All were non consensual. So I think the only thing that comes close to an overall connection would be the consensual part. I have friends that I look at them and say that is not my style I would not allow that by my slave or sub. Others I consider to be very extreme and probably not do.

So what is my point? Well considering that we are one side of control or the other We are a bunch of anarchists.